Relationships I Intentionally Pursue–and Why

Relationships are the spice of life! The best moments in life are those shared with other people. Here are the relationships that I intentionally “feed” with my time and energy–because it helps me pursue emotional health, and hopefully, I’m adding value to the recipients’ emotional health, too, by seeking to leave them in a better place than when I entered their presence.

• Relationship with God. Since He made me and loves me more than anyone else, and He’s blessed me beyond what I deserve, I show my love for Him by staying in constant conversation with Him throughout every day with short prayers, once-a-day reading of His Word (the Bible) to see what He’s said to me, and a weekly church attendance to worship Him with others who share my values.
• Relationship with my wife. My wife doesn’t like leftovers–the ones in the fridge, and my leftover energy. I make time just about every night for “chillin'” with her and hold date night on Fridays as sacred time to connect and have fun together. I also seek to plan a monthly weekend away to break away from the rut of housework/routines, and to give our marriage some space to renew.
• Relationship with my kids. Now that they are well into their teens, they don’t seek to be around me as they did in younger years. So, I must initiate conversations with them to get ‘in their world’ and celebrate their journey an pray for their struggles. Bedtime has always been a connection time for prayer and communicating my most important values to them.
• Relationship with my friends. This is a group that I wish I had more bandwidth for development of relationships. Friends fill in the emotional health gaps that family cannot. To have transparent, vulnerable conversations with guys who “get me” and who are “for me” is a priceless piece of my life. Social media is not the same as face-to-face, but can still serve as a check-in for each others’ lives and a place to affirm/celebrate/commiserate/encourage.
• Relationship with my boss. Since I’m a solopreneur, I don’t have an actual boss right now. The closest thing for me now is to find out how I can support my pastors. To be a good leader, I have realized I need to be a good follower.
• Relationship with my team. Again, as a solopreneur, I don’t have direct reports, but as a non-profit board chairperson, I do lead volunteers (currently with the national organization for launching/growing small businesses called SCORE). It’s my goal to do a 1-to-1 with each member of that team–to hear their goals and get to know what makes them tick/enthusiastic, so that we can serve best together for the greater good.
• Relationship with idea-people. Talk about energy-producing! I have set up an informal personal “board of directors”, made up of people with whom I can have coffee on occasion, who are wise sounding boards to bounce off business ideas, whom I allow to speak into my growth strategy. I leave them with a to-do list and a zest for implementing their insights.
• Relationship with new acquaintances. I enjoy networking events, and the main reason is to connect to 1-2 people who I’ve wanted to get to know better–and set up a 1-to-1 with them in the week ahead, to hear their story and to see how we can potentially add value to each other. A broad network allows me to be a go-to person in the community to connect others to resources as well.
• Relationship with my coaching clients. Each client is a unique individual who has a dream to be a better version of him/herself so that he/she can impact their circle of influence in a greater way. I seek to dig out/excavate where they want to go (vision) and strategies that they know need to turn into concrete action plans that will get them to that desired future. Coaching is a relationship of trust, and it’s a beautiful thing when the synergy between me and my client produce breakthroughs!

I love these people who help make me the man I am today. Who is helping shape your life? Which relationships need more of your attention? How will you get them into your schedule, and commit to doing so? If you haven’t found me on Linkedin yet, search for Paul D. Casey and reach out for a connection. Let’s resource each other!